Monday, August 10, 2015

Are You Encouraging Him (or Her) to Cheat on You?

This world seems to become morally blacker by the second.  I look around me and see person after person fall into spiritual devastation and agonizing vice.  I hear the sadness, feel the fear of consequences, and see the crumbling of marriages and homes.  It sometimes might feel to many women that men were simply designed to commit adultery and that any woman who thought otherwise was simply dreaming.  I have had people tell me this many times in various ways.

In such a temporal world, where temptations run high and sex is cheap I find most strange a phenomenon that also rises in popularity as we speak and which for the life of me I simply cannot understand.  I have often heard both husbands and wives recount joys and glories of watching X rated movies together in order to get in the mood for their own bedroom affairs.  This practice absolutely boggles my mind.  "I encourage him to watch beautiful naked women have sex right in front of me and then am devastatingly shocked that he goes out and has an affair with a younger woman.  What an evil, untrustworthy man he is!  I would never have guessed!"  I'm sorry, but does that make any sense to anyone out there?  The fact is that if you are encouraging and even participating in such an act, you are voluntarily opening the door to your significant other cheating on you!  Men and women in those videos (as far as I know as I have never watched one) are, by nature or surgery, meant to look beautiful, enticing, and exciting.  Compare that to stark reality in a man or woman who is getting higher in years and who does not look perfectly airbrushed.  Logically, I do not see how a person can act in that kind of manner and then be surprised when their significant other cheats.  I do not quite gather how they would have the right to prove angry, since they also were watching naked people of the opposite gender with a wink and a smile.  

The fact is, my friends, that if we want something to last forever, we need to treat it as though it is special and precious.  We need to be fiercely loyal to each other and recognize that home is where it is.  And if one evening neither person is in the mood?  I have a bombshell shock of an idea.  How about if the couple have a quiet dinner, turn off their iphones and talk to each other?  Strengthen your relationship in different ways.  "Bliss" as one male friend of mine described it, "is only one way of showing love."  Love can be expressed in many ways and a healthy relationship needs more than physical expression.  It requires verbal expression, innocent, uplifting togetherness, and a blending not only of body but of mind, heart and spirit.  Work out together.  Sing together.  Read together.  Enjoy your children together.  Or hit the theater, snuggle up close and remember why you fell in love in the first place.   

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