I love my lady friends. I really do. I want what is best for them and to that end I felt remarkably saddened this week to hear a woman about whom I care very much publicly joke about wanting to meet a certain male celebrity, and fantasizing about him falling in love with her. She proceeded about this verbal business not twenty feet from her husband, who "jokingly" shook his head at her absurdity and cast his eyes downward.
What else was he to do?
Granted, this might prove an extreme incident. Perhaps their marriage proved such that language of this nature merely acted as a harmless, humorous game. Surely said celebrity would never truly choose a simple commoner so it is perfectly fine to secretly indulge the hope, right? But let's plow through this concept at a higher magnification.
I don't know about you, but I have ever only known one way to treat a significant other. My heart and my conscience only work one way and that is to devote everything to that object of my attention. My earliest consciousness has been captive to the idea that if one chooses to commit oneself to a spouse, all other bets are off. No other member of the opposite gender exists in a romantic manner. I might extend compassion, human charity and the like to someone else as required by Christian law, but romantically my mind shuts down in regard to other men when it hits commitment zone. I don't know about you, but I would not necessarily hope and pray for a relationship in which the man to whom I have given my all jokes about flirting with or checking out other women. I can't imagine that such is anyone's ideal romantic situation. It boggles my mind to think that anyone would actually want to be subject to such treatment.
We find ourselves in a world and society that finds marriage crumbling around every corner. We find the concept of "happily ever after" a hazy, strange blur from the indefinite, Disney tinted past and the general reality is that relationships find themselves mangled with astonishing swiftness. Do we want to spend the rest of our lives in breaking up and searching again for the one or would we be happier putting our all into what God has already given us? Fantasizing about people other than our spouses hardly strengthens our current situations, and joking about it, whether around a spouse or not, seems an obvious way of asking for trouble.